Okay Fine Here Are Some Material Things That Have Improved Being at Home 24/7 For Me

Eh!

People keep asking about certain things but I don’t like to post shopping links on social media as it seems to mess with ads and interactions and stuff.

Disclaimer: I don’t have or use affiliate links of any kind and have no brand relationships at all. I do enough online shopping and judging that I probably could but right now I don’t care. If you manufacture expensive home improvement products and want to convince me to care I am definitely open to being sent things for free. Just putting that out there. But I have a book out and don’t even have a literary agent, and I’m gonna die someday and don’t have a will, and I’m a hedonist with a memory problem— you get the idea— there’s a lot about me that comes with no strings attached.

  1. This Gamer Chair of “It Happened To Me: I Needed An Office Chair, The Best Available Option was a Deeply Discounted "Gamer Chair," But They Do Not Come in Discreet Packages The Way Mail-Order Sex Stuff Does, & They Should” infamy. I would never pay full price for this and I didn’t, but ultimately the adjustable and lockable lumbar, neck, and leg supports made this better than a lot of “executive” chairs, which I know a lot about, as I used to be an executive assistant and my life was primarily putting together furniture when it wasn’t morally gray personal errands and overhearing things that went right through my Vault of Discretion and into the Black Hole of Forgetting As Self Defense. Anyway it’s a decent chair, take the time to really tighten all of the bolts as you go.

  2. These Side-Sleeper Headphones. I encourage you to get all the details from the Am*zon link and find these elsewhere if you can, which goes for the next few links too. Anyway, these headphones. Are they fancy? No. They’re quite simple Bluetooth flat-shaped earbud-quality headphones encased in a standard CVS Health And Beauty Aisle sort of headband. Do they do what they say durably enough? Yes absolutely. These are cozy under a winter hat, stay on while exercising, and are comfortable enough for me to sleep in my usual fetal position while drifting off to “Oldies Playing In Another Room And It’s Raining” instead of the woman in the unit next door having her third party this week. The parties keep turning into drunk fights with her friends, who she clearly hates, and then has over again the next day. Anyway! The fabric part is washable but importantly they are not very expensive so if you do accidentally wash the entire thing as I inevitably do with earbuds and earbud-adjacent things, it’s not like you will have to track down a specific Business Class SkyMall catalog to replace them.

  3. This power strip. I’m a stickler about electrical and you all give me anxiety with your daisy chains of gear. Internet people say shit like “I’m a hacker witch” and “be gay do crimes” when what they mean is “I’m pushing the limits of my rental’s utilities which were last updated in 1963” and “I might cause a house fire.” This is a sturdy circular power strip with USB that mounts on or under any surface, has its own very long extension cord, and the plug is the flatter angled style so it can both run behind furniture and leave the second half of an outlet available. It therefore solves many of the usual issues for me in one and it seems like it could survive a direct lightning strike, so okay.

  4. InstaTrim peel and stick caulking. I have some variety of obsessive-compulsive disorder, okay. But now, my kitchen sink is no longer rotting through the seam in my backsplash, and it looks so nice and smooth and I can ignore it again. Peel and stick things are real hit or miss. This does a very certain thing well. I showed this to another friend with obsessive-compulsive disorder and he kind of cooed. Whatever, real ones know.

  5. The “grow frames” by Modern Sprout. Ugh this thing was so fucking expensive for what it is but it’s very cute, has an automatic timer with little sunrise and sunset fades, and brings genuine sunlight-quality lighting into my kitchen which has no window in it because I live in a “loft”. I use it as a pretend window. If you live in a basement or hole I would also recommend it for that. The kitchen scraps regrowing over the sink are obviously pleasant but I have noticed that it also does the mood thing that sun lamps for seasonal depression do. I got a cheaper clip lamp grow light for my other plants in another room that the plants seem to love but would probably be too harsh to sit and stand next to all day, whereas these frames have a pretty well designed way of keeping the light on the plants but also adding a day glow to wherever they are.

That’s all I got for now.

Love,

Julian